joi, martie 19, 2009

my life, my body, my choice

used to be so happy 'n see life in pink... i used to love life, i used to love smiling, going out with friends, do lots of stupid things... i used to eat and not to feel so guilty about it... now i've changed... anorexia is killing me.. i always feel so guily when i eat, i'm not going out cuz i don't want people stare at me 'n me feeling so fat... i'm crying, i want my old life back, i want to be like i used to be.. it's so frustrating, i'm so mad! my life that i hate, my weight that i hate, the size that i hate... i'm dying for size zero... i'm always wearing clothes 2 sisez bigger so i would look smaller.. i wish i was pretty, beautiful, skinny, petite, cute and with that perfect body. perfection for me is an unknown term that scares me and that i want so bad! drinking water, eating only apples 'n taking pills is not helping me, it's not making me feel i can reach my goal. i'm so mad when i see those perfect girls 'n i'm always dating only not skinny guys... it's frustrating, i'm not me anymore :(

5 comentarii:

  1. those are the most hurtful words in the world!

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  2. anorexia is killing you.. be strong baby. I'll be there for you through it all, remember?>:D<

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  3. si eu am suferit de anorexie....a fost groaznic!!si stiu la ce te referi cu apa...seara stateam in pat si nu mai puteam face nimic pentru ca eram mult prea slabita...nici nu mai vreau sa imi amintesc...am slabit 20 kg in 2 luni, ajunsesem o umbra:-(

    si acum ma simt inca grasa si de fiecare data cand mananc am remuscari...dar pot sa iti spun ca POTI trece peste asta...trebuie doar sa nu iti mai pese de ce spun cei din jurul tau...un om nu e facut doar din corp, ci mai ales din SUFLET, iat sufletul tau e ceva minunat!!!

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  4. Nu are treaba cu sufletul. Pentru ea corpul si banii sunt mult mai importanți. Mulțumesc ca mi’ai luat di inima cu tine. Si așa nu aveam nevoie de ea, am descoperit’o pentru puținul timp si am înnebunit. Da’i foc. Eu nu am nevoie de așa ceva.

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  5. You allways were so fking pretty. But you cant recognize love anymore. How do you want to see what is beautifull without your fking soul.

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tokahontas says

welcOme tO my page (: